The Sandsibs are Morons
by a blue note
Summary: see the sandsibs, the ones we all know and love...as complete idiots... but there not the only ones on complete crack! read and find the rest of the characters you know and love act completely out of character!
1. 25 packs of cards

25 packs of cards

kankuro- is this your card?

gaara- no

kankuro- is this your card?

gaara- no

kankuro- is this your card?

gaara- no

kankuro- is this your card?

gaara- no

Kankuro- is this your card?

Gaara- yes!

kankuro- really?!

Gaara- no!

kankuro- i can't believe i haven't found your card yet! i mean i've went through 25 packs of cards, which has 52 cards each so that's like...25 packs of cards!!

Gaara- so, get another pack

kankuro- fine!

Temari- i'm going shoe shopping!...for shoes!!! do you guys want anything?

Gaara- don't you already have shoes? and don't say you don't cause you wearing them right now!

Temari- i want different ones...

Gaara- like the 50 you have in your closet that you never wear?!

Temari- yes...

Kankuro- this card says "give gaara $20"...

Gaara- obey the card!...it's a magic card obey it!!

Find more sandsibs are morons here: http://chaotixfreak.


	2. knife throwing accident

The Sandsibs Are Morons   
knife throwing accident  
who's better spider-man or bat-man?

Temari- omg! omg! OMG!!

kankuro-...do i dare ask?

Temari- i found a ring in gaara's underwear drawer!

kankuro- well i see i don't have to ask cause you blurt it out anyway, and gaara is so lucky! i mean the magic dresser never gave me anything!

Temari- magic dresser?

Kankuro- yeah, it's amazing! cause like when i have enough dirty clothes on the floor then like they dissappear for like 2 hours later i find them in my dresser...CLEAN!! and it the same with the fridge and the dishes too!

Temari- i can't believe your the stupid!! I'M the one who does the laundy! I'M the one who puts the clothes away!!I'M the one who goes to the grocery store and does ALL the shopping!! I'M the one who cleans the dishes and puts them away! me!me! ME!!!

kankuro- ...are you sure it's not magic?

Temari- YES!! it's all ME!!

kankuro-ok, it is "air quote" you "air quote" and "air quote" you "air quote" do alot of work to do, but "air quote" you "air quote" won't have to do much work in 2 years from now where we'll have robots and maids doing everything for us!...wait...the sounds kinda...dirty (says dirty in a pervert kinda way and nose starts to bleed)

Temari- (slaps kankuro)

kankuro- ow! that hurt!

temari- pay attention damn you!! we NEED to find out what this ring is for!!

kankuro- why? i mean it's just a ring...

Temari- i'm a nosey bitch that's why!! and it's not just any ring!! it's an ENGAGMENT RING!!! can you believe it!!?

kankuro- ...you're marring gaara?

temari- No!! it means gaara's going to ask someone to marry HIM!!

kankuro-...you?

Temari- NO!

kankuro- good cause i was about to say...

Temari- say what?

kankuro- something cunning i'm sure, but i forgot...

Gaara- Hey! my ring! that's for finding it!

kankuro- who's the ring for?

gaara- who ever buys it

temari- what? what do you mean? where did you get it? does this mean you're not getting married? how much did it cost? what time is it?! are they having a sale at k-mart today? how many days till Christmas? does it feel cold in here?

Gaara- i can answer most of those...it means i'm selling the ring and i got it from a dead lady who was dead...not dieing a slow painful death...(LIES!! he's a liar!)

kankuro- how did she die?

Gaara- knife throwing accident...she stabbed herself many times...i didn't do it... (LIES!! he's a liar..)

kankuro-...

gaara- anyway, yes this means i'm NOT getting married!! i'm only 13!!

temari-...i thought you graduated

Gaara- and no i don't know what time it is cause we don't have any clocks in our house!! ...or doors or windows (mutters doors and windows part)

temari- what?

gaara- Nothing!...and the rest i don't know...

kankuro- i'll give you 5 bucks for the ring...

gaara- DONE!! (grabs $5 and runs out the door to spend on candy or a chainsaw or something i don't know...)

Kankuro- heheheh, what a moron!

Temari- i'll give you a dollar for it...

kankuro- DONE!

http://chaotixfreak. 


	3. z ranked mission

The sandsibs are morons, and shikamaru job shadows (hahaha get it? I do!)  
The Z ranked Mission!  
also to cool for radio

kankuro and gaara watching TV

TV- and the winning lottery numbers are...7-92-3-16-2!!

Gaara- DAMN IT!!...oh wait...no..that's right...DAMN IT!!...oh wait...I WON!!

kankuro- ...awesome

Gaara- HAHAHA!!! That's right kankuro I won!!! hahaha!! you totally wish you were ME right now don't you!! 

kankuro- not really...

Gaara- anyway what do i do?

kankuro- i don't know, maybe TV knows...

TV- the winner can collect there prize money here at blocked for MY protection

Gaara- ...a z ranked mission!!

kankuro- z? (shout out to all JTHM fans!)

Gaara- it's only the BEST kinda letter

kankuro-...k

Gaara- TEMARI!!! I'M GOING TO THE TV STATION!!

Temari- NO GAARA!! you're GROUNDED!!!

gaara- but...

temari- NO!

gaara- (pushes lamp off the table) but kankuro broke a lamp!!

kankuro- (processing...) HEY!!

temari- well...we do need a new lamp...GAARA!!!

gaara- what?! what do you want!!

Temari- kankuro broke a lamp, the lamp is broken...go get a new one! (hands gaara $20)

gaara- (thinking: works every time) why the hell do I have to do EVERYTHING?!

-----------------------later at some kinda lamp store--------------------------

shikamaru- hello, my name is shikamaru may i help you find something today? (says in a unfriendly go away kinda way)

gaara- i'm gaara of the sand, my rockstar name is gaara of the funk and if i'm horny some people call me gaara of the fuck...

shikamaru- i really didn't need to know that..

gaara- ah, well now you do so...HA!!

shikamaru- ...

gaara-...

shikamaru- so, what the hell do you want?

gaara- oh yeah...i was going to ask you...do you know why i'm here? cause i forgot.

shikamaru- probably to buy a lamp...

gaara- oh wait! i know why i'm not suppose to be here! i'm suppose to be going to the TV station to cash in this winning lottery ticket! well...see ya!

shikamaru- wait!! you're not going anywhere till you buy a lamp!!

gaara- ...why?

shikamaru- cause i haven't sold one lamp since i got this job! and suprisingly this job has very high pay and i have to do very little work! so you're buying a lamp or i'll get fired!!

Gaara- ...

shikamaru- ...

Gaara- ...

shikamaru- ...

gaara- ...why am i here again?

shikamaru- uh...to buy a lamp?

Gaara- oh right! cause i broke one and blamed kankuro for it! what's the cheapest one you got?

shikamaru- these two (pulls 2 from under the counter)

gaara- how much?

Shikamaru- 30 bucks

gaara- what if i just got 1?

shikamaru- still, 30 bucks

gaara- DAMN IT!! well...i could always run away from home..i mean there's nothing holding me back...oh wait food...i MUST return for food...damn it!...can't you just take 20 dollars for it?

shikamaru- sorry, we can't change the price unless the items broken...

gaara- ...(pushes lamp off the table)

shikamaru- ...

gaara- ...

shikamaru- ...

gaara- ...

shikamaru- ...

gaara- ...

shikamaru- ...

gaara- ...

Shikamaru- that's 20 dollars

Gaara- awesome...

----------------later that day-----------------

Gaara- i want MY money!!

random girl- are you the winner?

gaara- yes

random girl- sorry, we used your money to buy a million dollar puppy!

gaara- where is it?

random girl- we sold the million dollar puppy for a million dollars.

Gaara- then i want my money!

random girl- sorry we used the million dollars to buy ticket for a hockey game...

gaara- then give me the tickets!

random girl- we can't, we already went

gaara- ...twitch

-----------------------one killing rampage later---------------

Gaara- i'm back...

Temari- well, did you get the lamp?

gaara- i did

temari- where is it?

gaara- (remembering that he left the lamp in the store) ...kankuro has it

-------------------------a walk into a different room later------------------

kankuro- watching TV

temari- kankuro wheres' the lamp?

kankuro- oh yeah...some guy came by and broke it for no reason at all...

temari- Who?!

kankuro- a guy named sal...

http://chaotixfreak. 


	4. you're still alive

the sandsibs are morons and tenten is surprisingly still alive  
still alive  
it also comes with a happy meal toy!

tenten- hey neji! what's up?

neji- ...

tenten- ...

neji- ...

tenten- ...

neji- ...

tenten- ...

neji- ...

tenten- ...

neji- ...

tenten- ...

neji- ...

tenten- ...

neji- ...

tenten- ...

neji- ...

tenten- ...

neji- ...

tenten- ...

Neji- hey! you're still alive!

Tenten- you noticed!

http://chaotixfreak. 


	5. then it's just not accurate

The Sandsibs are Morons

then it's just not accurate

let's all sing merry tunes as we commit crimes:D

Kankuro- ...

Gaara- ...

Kankuro- go walk into that strangers house.

Gaara- no, that's wrong.

kankuro-...

Gaara- ...

Kankuro- you can sing a catchy tune...

Gaara- i...LOVE!...catchy tunes...

--------------almost 5 seconds later not 4...not 6..5------------------

Gaara- let's go walking into a strangers house, strangers house, strangers house! let's go walk into a strangers house where someone may or may not be home sing it

Shikamaru- what are you doing in my house?

gaara- hey, i know you!

shikamaru- ...yeah

Gaara- well, then the song's just not accurate

http://chaotixfreak. 


	6. kankuroosneakero

The Sandsibs are morons  
Kankuro-o-sneaker-o  
snappy under-title not found, deal with it

Temari- Kankuro, Gaara got arrested! he's in court right now!

Kankuro- this is almost as bad as that one time when itachi tried to take my sneakers off! 

(sneakers are shoes for those who don't already know...now.. Read on! for reading we ride!)

!!! it's Dr. Who time! flashback! FLASHBACK!!!

itachi- hey you! take your sneakers off!

kankuro- no!

itachi- take them off!

kankuro- no! runs away

Itachi- i'm coming after you!!

deirdra- don't even bother, we're never going to catch him with our boring, plain, normal shoes...

itachi & Deirdra- sigh

somewhere down the street

Kankuro- i didn't take my sneakers off, i didn't take my sneakers off, i didn't take my sneakers off, cause i'm kankuro-o-sneaker-o sing it

Also I kinda stole this chapter off family guy ;)

http://chaotixfreak. 


	7. let's all go watch judge judy

Sand sibs are morons   
Let's all watch Judge Judy!  
batman should be here by now…

Kankuro- you know, just randomly, out of the blue ya know I'm just going to say "these are my shoes"…you won't know when…I will just say it….in the car, plane, mall, starbucks, paris, when I'm brushing my teeth, playing a game, on a mission, or perhaps learning how to ride a bike!…you will never know…until I say it, then you'll know…maybe…

Temari- would you shut up! Gaara's in court! Oh, this is terrible! My baby brother in court and I'm not there taking "his first court day" pictures! This is horrible!

Kankuro- relax, we'll just turn on the T.V. to Judge Judy…turns on the tv to channel 18, where she's on around 4:00..yes..i know when judge judy is on..don't you judge me…

Temari- oh yay! I can tape it, just like I taped my divorce!

Kankuro- …you were never married…

Termari-…uh..shut up and watch your brother!

----------- In Court ---------------

Gaara- well…I'm screwed…

Mattkur- hi (takes a seat next to him)

Gaara- who are you?

Mattkur- I'm a lawyer, I'm suppose to cover for one of Ashley's people cause she couldn't be here.

Gaara- why? What happened?

Mattkur- well, I'm suing her, then she sued me for suing her, and then I sued her again for suing me just because I was suing her, and then she was going to sue me if I didn't help you josh.

Gaara- …I'm not josh

Mattkur- shit, wrong room…oh well you'll have to do, I'm sure Ashley can defend herself.

Gaara- what?

Mattkur- I'm her lawyer...

Gaara- …..

Mattkur-…..

Gaara-…..

Mattkur- it makes perfect sense if you think about it long enough.

Person- all rise! Now presenting honorable Judge Judy!

Judy- ok, everyone sit down.

Everyone- sits

Judy- ok, stand up again.

Everyone- stands up

Judy- sit

Everyone- sit

Judy- stand...

Everyone- stand

Judy- ok, everyone sit

Everyone- sits

Judy- ok mister Fredrick, tell me what happened.

Fredrick- yes your honor, it was a blue, clear, wonderful day outside, birds were singing, cookies where baking, children were screaming in terror as I run them over…

Judy- get to the point.

Fredrick- he stole my paper cup.

Everyone- gasp!

Judy- and your story? 

Gaara- well, I was out walking on the side walk, and he throws a cup out his car window so, I pick it up and throw it in the trash.

Fredrick- hey! I carefully tossed it out! I was going to come back to get it! But I couldn't cause it was gone! And it's all thanks to you, you son of a-

Mattkur- HEY!

Fredrick- what?

Mattkur-…you talked when it wasn't your turn..

Fredrick-….

Mattkur- that's like interrupting…

Fredrick-….

Mattkur- shame on you…

Fredrick-…..

Mattkur-….

Fredrick-…..

Judy- I CAN'T DECIDE!! Let's do this the American way and vote, who vote gaara guilty.

Fredrick- slowly raises hand

Judy- who find gaara not guilty?

Jury, gaara, Mattkur, and 9/10 of America- raises hands

--------Sand Sib household ------or pillow fort….----- no house…----------

Kankuro- well, that was stupid….

Temari- almost as stupid as my marriage!

Kankuro- temari…

Temari- yes?

Kankuro- you were never married…

Temari- ofcourse I was!

Kankuro- no….no you weren't

Temari- then how did I have you?

Kankuro- temari…

Temari- yes?

Kankuro- I'm your brother...

http://chaotixfreak. can find mattkur on or http//wheresbob. 


	8. halloween was yesterday

The Sandsibs are morons  
and halloween was yesterday  
what was you for halloween?

Itachi- MUHAHAHA!! tonight i will unleash my master plan to destory and ruin this halloween!hehe!

deirdra- ...halloween was yesterday

itachi- well, then i'll..just destroy the world then, Muhahahaha! Hehehe! HA!...i'm funny

MEANWHILE

AT

THE

MOVIES!!!

Sasuke- eats popcorn

Kakashi- (who's sitting in the first row) YOU! down in front!!

BACK WITH ITACHI'S EVIL PLAN TO DESTROY THE WORLD

Itachi- Muhaha! now to destroy the world! with the help of these aerosol cans it will cause global warming and melt the earth! muhehe!! shakes can and sprays it

MEANWHILE!!!

Gaara- wow, look at that box

Kankuro- the box is yellow...tis a yellow box

Gaara- hmm, i wonder what's inside...

------------------------------------------------

WILL SASUKE AND KAKASHI FINISH THERE MOVIE? WILL GAARA AND KANKURO OPEN THE YELLOW BOX OF MYSTORY?! WILL ITACHI'S EVIL PLAN WORK AND MELT THE EARTH? find out, RIGHT NOW!! yes, yes in the next chapter, and no...

http://chaotixfreak. 


	9. time traveling yellow boxof libery?

The Sandsibs are morons  
Time Traveling Yellow box...of liberty?  
who stole the cookie from the cookie jar? you did, we know you did. the F.B.I is on there way.

Gaara- "do not open till Christmas, or else..."

Kankuro- we should totally open it.

Gaara- But it said "or else" that's like what mob members say before something bad happens...

Kankuro- what!? no box threatens me! open the box Gaara! and feel free to sing a catchy tune as you do so.

Gaara- I LOVE catchy tunes!

Kankuro- sing it brother

Gaara- i'm going to open this box...and i wonder what's inside sing it

as soon as he opened the box they got sucked in and when they opened opened there eyes, they where somewhere else

Kankuro- hmm, poorly made house, guys in wigs and nicely dressed, a calendar of 1776...the box must have been a time machine!...I can't believe Temari got me a time machine for Christmas!

Gaara- hey, why do you get it!? what possible use do you have for it?

Kankuro- I'd use it to go back in time to get that box of old hats

------------- Flash Back -------------

At some Yard Sale

Kankuro- wow, these are some really old hats. boy, are they neat...well I didn't bring money with me so I'll get them tomorrow...waiting...for ME! leaves

Itachi- sneaks over to the box muhaha, i'll think i'll buy this box of old hats just to ruin his happiness it's the perfect pl- ooo! look there's a cat in the hat hat hat..  
hat hat hat? cat in the hat hat...hat... grr...cat in the hat...hat hat... cat..in...the...hat hat hat- damn it!

-----------------------------------------------------------

Gaara- that's it? that's all that you would do?

Kankuro- yeah, why do you got something better?

Gaara- yes, I would to credit for inventing T.V.

------this isn't a flash back but this is probably what would happen------

Gaara- this is called television all you got to do is plug it into the- hey, where's the electrical outlet?

people- what's that?

--------------------------------------------------------------

Gaara- hey, when where electrical outlets made?

Kankuro- oh i don't know...

?- have you fellows signed the declaration of independence?

Kankuro- omg! You Thomas Jefferson!

Thomas Jefferson- yes and your some…person I don't know.

Kankuro- yep, and you'll never know. I wish we could talk but I have to find some way to get home…maybe if we found that box…

Thomas Jefferson- what box?

Kankuro- the yellow box!

Thomas- oh, you mean the toaster! Ben invented it, it's over there.

Ben- ok, now see now. I take this piece of bread and place it in this box, and then I like this flameable box with a match like-

Kankuro- nnnoooo! (grabs box)

Ben- what the-

Kankuro- sorry we need this, Gaara!!

Gaara- coming!

Ø then like they did last time Kankuro and Gaara opened the box and got sucked back in

Kankuro- wow, that was really bizarre. No more time traveling for me again.

Gaara- hey, check it out! My face is on the $5 bill!

Kankuro- how did that-…wait you didn't sign the declaration on independence did you?!

Gaara- I did. But I'm on money look! hold up $5

Kankuro- but, what happened to Abraham Lincoln? What does he have to do with the declaration of independence?! What about the slaves? This doesn't make sense! 

Gaara- Cool, I'm on the penny too!

Kankuro- a penny's worth nothing…

Gaara- your just jealous…

http://chaotixfreak. 


	10. shut up and bring me more tabasco sause

The Sand sibs Are morons  
Shut up and get me some more Tabasco sauce, Kelly!  
sometimes I go to movies by myself...

Temari- Gaara I am so glad you agreed to have lunch with me! it will be just like little brother big sister bonding time!

Gaara- yeah..sure.. (just in it for the free meal)

Temari- oh God, there's Sasuke and Sakura..let's just hope that she doesn't come and talk to-

Sakura- hey Temari!

Temari- omg! hey sakura! wow, what a small world this is!

Sakura- yeah totally, we should like totally hang out, like at like totally at the mall!

Temari- oh my gosh! let's go right now!

sakura- totally!

then off they skip out the door, tralalalalala!

Gaara- ...

Sasuke- ...

Gaara- ...

Sasuke- so..we'll sit here then.

Gaara- ok

both sit down in a booth

Shikamaru- hello, gentlemen i'm Shikama-

both- we know who you are!

Shika- oh yeah... anyway what can I get you?

Gaara-yeah, i'll have the Tortellini allacart, and the soup of the day.

Sasuke- I'd want pancakes, orange juice, and I'd also want the soup of the day...read that back to me.

Shika- uh, pancakes, orange juice, soup of the day.

Sasuke- ok, scratch that last part I want the soup that was served yesterday...

Shika- um, ok...i'll be right back leaves

Gaara- that's not lunch. that's breakfast, that's what you eat for breakfast...not lunch.

Sasuke- ok, i'll order some French fries just chill...

Gaara- -.-"

Sasuke- hey look. Neji's here too!...and he's sitting all alone...

Gaara- he looks like he's in pain!

Sasuke- maybe food poisoning...?

Gaaara- could be..

Sasuke-...

Gaara- did you hear that?

Sasuke- what?

Gaara-..hmm I guess it was nothing, I just thought I heard some girl singing and laughing her head off..but maybe it's just my imagination

(stares at Shikamylove because only she will get this)

Shika-ok, here it is (puts food on table)

Sasuke- oh, I need an order of French fries, and since the syrup's already on the table..ill guess i'll have some cereal too, fruit loops  
Also give my complements to the chief!

Shika- you haven't even eaten anything yet!

Sasuke- hey! Rick works really hard, and I think he deserves a complement once and a while!

Shika- yeah, he does work pretty hard..i'll be right back with the cereal and French fries. leaves

Gaara- takes a bite of tortellini then stares at sasuke

Sasuke- what?

Gaara- your not eating...

Sasuke- yeah, I need Tabasco sauce...

Gaara- Tabasco sauce?

Sasuke- yes, Tabasco sauce...

Gaara-...Tabasco sauce?

Sasuke- yes deaf-o Tabasco sauce!...and I also need a bowl for my pancakes.

Sasuke- ok, here's your fries and fruit loops. sets them on table

Sasuke- I need a bowl for my pancakes and 2 bottles of Tabasco sauce.

Shika- are you serious?

sasuke- yes

Shika- sigh fine... leaves, once again

Sasuke- starts pouring syrup on his cereal and puts the fries and the pancakes in the same bowl

Gaara- O.o?!

Shika- ok, here's your Tabasco sauce, and I'm only going to make 1 more trip to the kitchen because people think I'm selling you drugs

Sasuke- are you?

Shika- no I don't have any today.

Sasuke and Gaara- aww.. (

Shika- anyway, i'm only going to make more trip to the kitchen, so you need anything else?

Sasuke- another bottle of Tabasco sauce...

shika-...ok leaves

Sasuke- starts putting Tabasco sauce in the bowl of French fries and pancakes

Gaara- um, what are you doing?

Sasuke- making pancake French fries soup..sooouuuuuppp!!

Gaara- sasuke, your starting to creep me out..

Sasuke- you know what would be great? a Tabasco milk shake...

gaara- but you have orange juice.

Sasuke- which goes perfectly with this chicken noodle soup! pours juice in soup which could use a little Tabasco sauce pours sauce in till bowl overflows, stops and pours the rest of the bottle in

Shika- here's you bottle of Tabasco s-

Sasuke- I want to see the manager...

shika- ugh, fine, i'll go get h-

Sasuke- jumps up on the table MANAGMENT!!!

then a big man with an unnaturally high voice came dancing to the table

Manager- what seems to be the problem?

Sasuke- Problem! i'll tell you what the problem is!

everyone staring at sasuke, wanting to know what the problem was and wanting to see what they could do to help (what nice people!)

Sasuke- this waiter!! him! right there points to shika has ruined my food with Tabasco sauce! look! look what he has in his hand!

Shika- still holding the Tabasco sauce it hasn't been opened yet!

Manager- I'm terribly sorry! Kelly your fired!

Shika- ok, for the last time my name is not Kelly!

Manager- I don't care, I like calling you Kelly! so Kelly, your fired Kelly!

Sasuke- HAHA! that's what you get for messing with me, Nara!

Shika- what did I do?!

Sasuke- ...

Shika-...

Sasuke- shut up Kelly

http://chaotixfreak. thanks to Emily


	11. Don't mess with me Nara!

The Sandsibs are morons  
Don't mess with me nara!  
wow, 10...th chapter...i should quit while i'm ahead

at some news paper stand

Gaara- hey, shikamaru...can i have one of those news papers?

Shika- if you pay for it.

Gaara- oh come on! there like 75 cents!

Shika- sigh fine...

Gaara- yay! this will make perfect wrapping paper for the gift i got for Ashley for her B-day! (Nov. 16) (then off he went on his merry way to take me to the movies to go see, "a dog shot me in the face, so i got a better face")

Manager- Shikamaru your fired!

Shika- but- but why?

Manager- because you gave someone a free newspaper!

Shika- how did you find out?!

Manager- we got an anonymous tip from a customer...

Sasuke- DON'T MESS WITH ME, NARA!

Shika- what did i do?!

http://chaotixfreak. 


	12. they're actally not in this one

SandSibs are morons 11  
they're actally surprisingly not in this one...maybe next time

the chapter title today is chapter title, i'm lying, it's not...ever...don't read this again.

Sasuke- hey, shino!

Naruto- that's not how to grrrrrrrrreat people! you have to say skip around them, dance, dance, dance, dance some more! touch their hair with somebody elses left hand, give them a hug, play guitar hero for about an hour, get a job, dance a little bit more, and then jump through a big pool of jello! whoosh! then shake there hand! hey shino! sasuke made these really cool roll! there good! we call them sasuke rolls because sasuke's popular! shoves roll into shino's mouth

Shino- these are good, what's your secret...?

sasuke- come here...

shino- comes closer

sasuke- closer...

shino- comes closer

Sasuke- (whispers in his ear)...tabasco sauce

shino-...really?

Sasuke- but you have to shake it a certain way!...you have to...roll down this hill which is randomly here!

one rolling down a hill later

Sasuke- where did you get that milk?

Naruto- it's white-out so i don't have to brush my teeth! yay!

Shino- drinking white out? can't that stuff get you high?

Naruto- AS A KITE!!

Sasuke- you have bugs in your hair shino!

Shino- thanks! they're ants! 

Naruto- brushing his hair with a toilet scrubber

Sasuke- where are you getting these things from?!

naruto- hey...

shino & Sasuke- what?

naruto- look at that (points to toad)

Sasuke- it's a toad..

Naruto- ...i call him narutoad...

sasuke- ...

shino- ...i get it!

http://chaotixfreak. 


	13. i will fulfil my destiny

The sandsibs are morons  
I will fulfill my destiny!  
now 11 spider free! 

Gaara- i will fulfill my destiny for K.F.C. by-

some china guy- Gaara! what are you doing?! go dileiver that ord-

Gaara-(shoots the china person) THAT'LL TEACH YOU!! Don't you sneak up on me!!...twit...uh...where was I?...yeah! uum, I will deliver K.F.C.'s chicken wings with in 30 minutes or LESS!!... I will also work part time at a chinese deilivery place! and i will deliver it with 3!! 3 types of sause!! ...for...the manager...i-i just shot...

Manager- (with his last breath says...) .you're- your're fired...

Gaara-...I...have failed

http://chaotixfreak. 


	14. let's start a radio show

Sandsibs are morons  
Let's start a radio show!  
let's all go to the lobby!

ok, so you got 2 options your either listening to the radio or just imagine gaara in a radio studio...yay

Gaara- well, yeah...to try to increase our popularity we're now on the radio...uh so yeah if you have any questions about the comic, me, or some other people i get to answer that... but of course we probably won't get any- hey!! we got a letter!

" hi!

-Chaotixfreak"

Gaara- TT that's not a question! ...wait...do you mean like, am i high? well, no...because then they wouldn't have hired me...uh...well that's all the time we got so, send letters!

To send me letters either write me a review, note me on deviantart (user name chaotixfreak) or you can some how find out my name, get a hell lotta phone books and call everyone who has the same name as me till you find me….

http://chaotixfreak. 


	15. let's start a radio show 2

The sandsibs are morons  
Let's start a radio show! 2  
to, too, two, also...2 which 4

Gaara- yeah, i'm back...and not alone...we got a letter! I feel like dancing right now! but you know..you guys wouldn't see it so there's really no point anyway.

"Okay, question for Gaara of the Funk...

What came first? The chicken or egg? And what's the meaning of life?

Lastly... You've been chosen for jury duty! Have fun!

-Japaniak"

Gaara- um, yeah i think we got some of the naruto abriged gaara's mail...but i'll answer it the best i can...ok well the chicken or the egg one, people mess that one up all the time! but I Gaara know the true anwser to that question and actally the Rooster came first! you see the rooster came first the chicken came second they dated for a while and had an egg! now, let's see some other people's answers!

Naruto- clucky! 

Neji- ah well that's simple fate has chosen that the egg was first...or the chicken..although...but then again...i don't know...just let me think!!

Neji- I SAID LIKE ME THINK!!

kakashi- ya know they never had chickens or eggs back in my day...

sasuke- YOU'RE NOT OLD!!

Kakashi- ya know back in my day children never spoke...

sasuke- --

Sasuke- the duck...

Sakura- like you mean like, like like chicken chickens? or like chicken you like eat?  
like what do you like mean by like eggs? ya mean like dippy like eggs or like like puzzle eggs?

shikamaru- the chicken

Temari- we had eggs for breakfast so i'm going to go with the egg

Gaara- the rooster!!

Gaara- i couldn't believe how stupid people were...except me...and the answer to life...is the answer to that question (the chicken or the egg) and the gaara from naruto abridged has to go on jury duty? well i hope he shows up...they probably won't be to happy if he doesn't show up...anyway that's all the time we have! remember to send me some letters!

amv for this chapter me a review or note me on deviantart to ask gaara a question

http://chaotixfreak. 


	16. off to grandmothers house we go!

The Sandsibs are morons 15  
Off to grandma's house we go!  
today we'll talk about something serious in this under title today...I'm going to talk to you about-OMG IT"S SNOWING! goes to play outside

sandsib household- Christmas day

Temari- GAARA, HURRY UP!! OUR PLANE LEAVES IN 20MINUTES!!

Gaara- but I forgot to make grandma a Christmas present!

Termari- no time!! get in the car! pushes gaara out the door get in the car! get in the car! get in the car!  
...hey where's your brother? he was in the car last time I saw him.

Gaara- i don't know.

Temari- agh!! storms inside KANKURO!!

kankuro- WHAT?

Temari- WHERE ARE YOU KANKURO?!

Kankuro- I'M IN THE KITCHEN!

Temari- walks in the kitchen What are you doing?!

Kankuro- making a sandwich... start smearing peanut butter on the bread

temari- get in the car!

kankuro- but i'm making a sandwich!

Temari- GET IN THE CAR!!

kankuro- runs in fear to the car

Temari- well, that's everyo-...where's gaara?!

Gaara- I'm over here!

temari- gaara, what are you doing?!

gaara- making a snowman (er...i mean sandman...hmm that's kinda catchy, i think i might use that later)

temari- get in the car!

gaara-...ok

later at the airport

Temari- Hurry! hurry! HURRY! let's go we don't have much time! pulling gaara by is actually dragging him can't you run any faster?! Keep up kankuro! kankuro? stops running kankuro? gaara where's your brother?

gaara- on the floor i don't know

Temari- gaara, get off the floor! you know better than that! KANKURO!!

Kankuro- WHAT?!

Temari- WHERE ARE YOU?!

Kankuro- THE SANDWHICH LINE!

Temari- sigh I don't have time for this..gaara be a good boy and stay here for me, ok?

gaara- ok

one walk to the sandwich line later

temari- we don't have time for this kankuro! we have to hurry or we'll miss our flight!

Kankuro- but..i really want one!

Temari- you can get one on the plane! now hurry up!! 

one mad dash to get on a plane later

Gaara-Temari...

Temari- yes, Gaara?

Gaara- why is there a giant Christmas tree in the middle of the aisle?

Temari- i don't know..to get people in the Christmas spirit I guess...

Gaara- well it shouldn't be there! I JUST SHOULDN'T!! WHY!! WHY is it there!!

Temari- calm down gaara...

Stewartess- hello, would you like to order anything to eat for your flight this evening?

Temari- we'll have the shrimp. unlike those dysfunctional families

gaara- but-but i'm getting tired of eating shrimp...

Temari- Gaara, do you want us to be a dysfunctional family?

gaara- no

temari- then you're getting shrimp!

stewardess- same for you? (to kankuro)

Kankuro- yeah, but can you put the shrimp into a sandwich?

Stewardess- no, we can't make any more sandwiches cause we got sued that one time...(makes you wonder don't it?)

kankuro- Temari, you said i could get a sandwich on the plane...they have no sandwiches on this plane, I've been waiting for a long time..just for a sandwich...you lied to me temari, and I'm very disappointed in you

Temari- but kankuro i didn't know th-

Kankuro- I DON'T EVEN KNOW YOU ANYMORE!

almost 10 minutes later

Stewardess- OMG! THE PILOTES WERE DRUNK AND DIED OF ACHOLHAL POISONING! WE'RE GOING TO CRASH!

Gaara- This looks like a job for...THE SANDMAN! has random mask on and is in a super hero kinda pose

Temari- AND HIS BIG SISTER! FLYING GOLDEN DONUT GIRL! also has mask on let's go save these people!

Gaara- getting his suit-case down

Temari- Sandman what are you doing?!

Gaara- I forgot my cape.. digging through his suit-case

Temari- we don't have time! grabs gaara and runs into the cockpit (control room if you don't know airplane-talk

Gaara- ok! i know what to do! (jumps into the seat)

temari- ...

Gaara- ...

Temari- Why aren't you doing anything!?

Gaara- I don't know what to do!!

Temari- omg! what are we going to do!! starts to run around panicking

Gaara- hmm..what's the ocean doing in the sky?

Temari- AH!! takes the wheel..or whatever and pulls it up to make the plane not crash into the ocean

(ok, hi...yeah i'm going to do a quick explanation of what just happened...ok the plane was crashing so it was going down (towards the ocean) so when gaara looked out the window and saw the ocean and thought he was in the sky, then temari took the wheel and got the plane back up

temari- sigh of relief ok...but now what do we do? soon we'll run out of gas or explode or something!

?- did someone say.."but now what do we do?" ?!

Gaara & Temari- Gasp! it's..it's! could it be?! KANKURO O-SNEAKER-O!? (sneaker as in shoe)

Kankuro- that's right! now, Sandman you run the plane since you've had the most experience!

gaara- really?

Kankuro- yeah, like you can drive!

Gaara- I can't drive! I'm only 13!

kankuro- oh..well you watch the cop show that show you the awesome yet dangerous life of a cop on duty. it's when you get to see car chases, fighthing,sometimes gun shootings, and everything in-between! it's the show where you get to see how stupid crimals really are! and they get put behind bars! these good fine people risk their very lives just to make the streets safe,..but for how long...but for how long...

gaara- ...that's true

Temari- and what can I do?

Kankuro- flying golden donut girl...i still haven't forgiven you from the last time we met...I came here to keep my comrade sandman alive, I knew he wouldn't be able to do this with out me...so you..YOU! will do nothing...

Temari- (

Gaara- ok kankuro o-sneaker-o I'm at the controls! now what?

Kankkuro- hold on, I need to make a call on my sneaker phone pulls out another sneaker

one phone call later

Phone-Shika- you've called suicide help hotline, my name is shikamaru and I'm here to listen to your problems..so yeah, let it all out.

kankuro- tosses "phone" to gaara tell him what's happening! the wise elf will know what to do!

Gaara- I'm tiring to land a plane with no experience!

phone-shika- ..gaara is that you?

Gaara- JUST HELP ME!

Phone-Shika- ...ok, you know what i heard? i heard some guy say you couldn't land that plane!

Gaara- WHAT?! I'll show HIM! I'll show that GUY!!

Naruto- merry Christmas!

naruto clone 1- you to naruot!

naruto- thanks naruto!

naruot clone 2- i'm Jewish! D

naruto clone 1- isn't that something then?

Naruto- yeah that's cool! 

naruto clone 2- i got you a gift naruto!

naruto clone 1- I did too!

naruto- aww, you guys didn't have to get me anything! i love you guys!

naruto clone 1 & 2- we love you too naruto!

naruto-

naruto clone 1 & 2- 

naruto- ...i wish I had a real family TT

(ha! while you were busy reading gaar-...I mean sandman and kankuro o-sneaker-o have already landed the plane thanks to the wise elf)

Temari- i can't believe you landed the plane!

kankuro- yeah but where are we?

Gaara- oh, we're in the U.S.A! in the state of blocked for my protection in the town of blocked for my protection and on blcoked for my protection street!

Termari- well, we're never going to get to grandma's house now, now Christmas with the family either (

kankuro- and no presents (

Gaara- hey! we can spend Christmas with Ashley (that's me) family!

kankuro- hey yeah! )

Temari- that's a great idea!

and so they did! temari tryed on everyone's coats, kankuro finally had his sandwich and invented 3 different types of new sandwiches which you can now buy at subway for $2.25 for 2 sandwiches which are all named after him...kankuro...and gaara and I opened presents and then it started to snow so we when outside and kept each other warm if ya know what I mean ;)

inside the suicide hot-line building there was shikamaru sitting there in his little cubical

phone- ring ring ring

shika- you've called suicide help-hotline, I'm shikamaru and I'm here to listen to your problems. so let it all out.

phone-?- DON'T MESS WITH ME NARA! click (that means who eve that could be hung up)

shika- O ...dails phone

another phone right next to him (he's got 2 phones)- ring ring ring

shika- picks up phone you've called the suicide help hotline, I'm shikamaru and I'm here to listen to your problems so, ya know, you talk i'll listen...

Shika- (talk)- I think I might be going crazy! (panic)

shika- (listen)- we all feel that way sometimes, tell me what happened totally calm

Shika- (talk)- ok-o-ok t-there's this guy! I didn't do anything! ok! nothing! and...and he's alway's there! bad things happen man! bad things! panic and starting to break down

Shika-(listen)- I think this could be a misunderstanding, tell me do you have a stressful job?

shika- (talk)- y-yeah...

shika- (listen)- we'll maybe you should find something else..something you enjoy doing.

shika- (talk)- s-so your saying i should quit?

shika- (listen)- I think it's a good idea...

http://chaotixfreak. 


	17. gaara the romantic

the sand sibs are morons 16  
gaara the romantic  
my name was in the paper today...and i got this letter from the government the other day... i sent a letter back calling them losers...

gaara- hey temari?

temari- yeah gaara?

Gaara- can you buy me a banjo?

Temari- why...?

Gaara- because banjo music is sexy.

-----------------------------------------------------------------

Gaara- here Ashley i got you this! D

(me) Ashley- ...a carton of orange juice?

Gaara- ...

ashley- ...

Gaara- well, i thought it was romantic

------------------------------------------------------------------

gaara- hey look at that ceiling fan!

Ashley- yeah, ya know for some reason babies find fans fascinating!

Gaara- i find it arousing...

Ashley- what?

Gaara- nothing!

http://chaotixfreak. 


	18. akatsuki are a dysfunctional family

the sandsibs are morons 17  
akatsuki are a dysfunctional family...  
eat your shrimp

inside the akatsuki base

itachi- ...hey deidara!

deidara- what?

itachi- YOU HAVE MOUTH HANDS!

everyone giggles except deidara

deidara- oh yeah! well, your a...a...a-

Itachi- yes go on...

deidara- a...a...um...your a...

itachi- blonde moment, huh deidara?

everyone laughs except deidara who's like ToT

itachi- hey kisame, glad to see your laughing...i mean your alway's so blue!

again everyone laughs except deidara who's busy thinking of a comeback and kisame has his eyes filling up with tears

itachi- hey zet-

Deidara- OH YEAH! WELL, YOUR A GIRLY MAN!!

itachi- ...HAND-MOUTH!

Deidara- GIRLY MAN!! You wear make up to make yourself feel pretty!!!

Kisame- gasp mee too!!

Itachi- at least i'm not pinocchio!

sassori- how did you know that was my favorite movie? (calm)

Itachi- i didn't...i just said that cause of the puppets..and whatever (calm)

sassori- damn it...i just reveled that pinocchio is my favorite movie of all time...(calm)

Itachi- ...HAND-MOUTH!!

Deidara & kisame- GIRLY-MAN!!

Itachi- SHUT UP! SHUT UP YOU...shark...thing...YOU SHARK THING!

Sasori- Do you know why kisame's so blue itachi?…IT'S BECAUSE OF YOU!!

you can hear them all fighting and bitching at each other in the background

Temari- aren't you glad we're not a dysfunctional family, gaara?

Gaara- um, how did we get into their base?

http://chaotixfreak. 


	19. let's start a radio show 3

The Sandsibs are morons  
Let's start a radio show! 3  
I'd never set foot out of the kitchen!

Gaara- well, once again welcome to my radio show. It's really boring over h- OMG WE GOT A LETTER! I'm so happy I could write a hit solo album, but that takes a lot of work, so I guess I won't..anyway

"Dear Gaara,  
just a few questions:  
what is your biggest fear?  
what did you want to grow up to be when you were a little kid?  
what pet have you always wanted?  
and have you ever felt the need to call shika "kelly"?

Thanks for letting me pry into your business! Much appreciated!

Shikamylove"

Gaara- hmm, good questions…my biggest fear is probably be a world without catchy  
tunes or me not able to sing catchy tunes..i…LOVE…catchy tunes…also spiders.  
As for what I wanted to be when I was little..i wanted to be a spy, secret agent something like that, but now that I'm older I realize that I'm ridiculously good looking…so maybe I can do that as a career (totally took this from zoolander) and what kid didn't want a puppy! But temari didn't let me have one cause (ok, prepare to sing…a catchy tune) She's the biggest bitch in the whole wide world, She's a stupid bitch, if there ever was a bitch, She's a bitch to all the boys and girls. On Monday she's a bitch On Tuesday she's a bitch On Wednesday thru Saturday she's a bitch Then on Sunday just to be different, Shes u super king kamehameha bitch  
Have you ever met my sister temari, She's the biggest bitch in the whole wide world,  
She's a mean old bitch, she has stupid hair, She's a bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch Bitch, bitch bitch bitch bitch bitch bitch sing it …..and now you can clearly see that I …LOVE…catchy tunes…have I ever felt the need to call shika, Kelly? No. but there was this guy at this restaurant that called him Kelly…it was really weird, and he was kind of creepy…he had a really unnatural high voice, he was nice but he was creepy………anyway, that's all the time I have so remember, if you have questions for me or about the story or about the characters then write them down! ….and send them to me…..Gaara….yes…

This chapter's naruto amv is if you wanna here the song go here 


	20. a job hunting we will go

Sandsibs are morons  
a job hunting we will go!  
what's it to you, yeah what's it to you?

it all begins with shikamaru walking down the streets of konaha, it was all in all a peaceful day. he was off to his job interveiw to become an ambulance driver in the city and THEN there is this random Gaara right next to him! saying "hey shika"

Gaara- hey shika.

Shika- how do you keep finding me? --"

Gaara- well, i don't really have to do anything around the house...so i just kinda stalk you...like your some kinda animal

shika- ...right, anyway as much as i would like to stay and chat about this creepy thing your doing...i have a job interveiw to go to...alone starts to walk away

gaara- great! i'll go with you! skips to shika's side

---------------- one walk to the job interveiw later -----------------------

---------------- one entering to a building to go to the job interveiw later ----------

shika- sitting in a chair waiting to be called in

Gaara- sitting in a chair reading a 2 year old fashion magazine did you know wooden clogs are in? (clogs are like shoes, but weird)

Neji - (all the sudden out of now where comes into the room, flips his hair in a reallly golden magical way and sits down)

gaara- hey neji.

neji- hey gaara, what are you here for?

gaara- ...i don't know, why are you here?

neji- to brighten up cheer up the people here...they seem really depressed...so i assume they're sick.

shika- this is a hospital.

neji- that's why i said i assume they're sick, which i can see that's why you're here.

shika- i'm not sick

neji- no, it just seems like your really sad

shika- --

secretary- Nara, Shikamaru?

Shika- that's me.

Secretary- the manager will see you soon but first you must fill out some fourms

shika- alright.

secretary- will they need forums as well? (looks to gaara and neji)

shika- no, i don't think-

Gaara- HE'S LYING WELL TAKE FIVE!!

sercretarty- hands shika, gaara, and neji the forums

shika- (thinking: ah man, what a drag) starts filling out forums

gaara- (thinking: i thought he was buying girl scout cookies, oh well) starts filling out forums

neji- (thinking: it's been a while since i flipped my hair) flips hair and starts filling out forum

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Name- Shikamaru

Birthday- September 22

Sex (as in gender)- Male

any driving experence- none, but fast learner

where do you imagen you in 5 years- ambulance driver

other job experience- (not even going to bother listing these down, just so you know he had a LOT of jobs)

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

name- Gaara

Birthday- January 11

Sex - saving it for someone special

Any driving experience- i've landed a plane once with no experience

Where do you imagen yourself in 5 years- prison

Other Job experience- none

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

name- Neji

Birthday- H

Sex- i'm a stray, (stright and gay) like i'll notice when one of my girlfriends (as in a girl as a friend kinda girlfriend) gets her hair cut, or a new adorable outfit, and i like guys but not in a like like like like like like kinda way, maybe ya know man i don't even know.

Any driving experience- none

where do you imagen your self in 5 years- a model...no rockstar...no a super star.

Other Job experience- none

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

----------------------one about 20 minutes later-------------------

Manager- well, i'd like to thank you gentlemen for coming, but i'm afraid some of you didn't do so well filling out these forums. Shika, it seems as though you tried to suck up...and i'm glad you've had job experience, but it seems you don't have to much commitment to them. every job you've had it seems you got fired withn the week. your just not what we're looking for.

shika-...sigh

Mananager- and neji...your's just confused me, i doubt your birthday could be on the letter "H"

neji- What! can't a guy be born on the letter "H"? says it like he's black

manager- and gaara! i'm very pleased with your results it seems you were 99 truthful.

Gaara- 99?

manager- yeah, we just don't believe you've landed a plane with no experience.

gaara- but i did...(big puppy dog eyes)

manager- either way, we find that gaara is perfect for the job!

------------ one later that day as an abulance driver later-----------

Gaara- where too? (says like a taxi driver)

Nurse- the hospital! go to the HOSPITAL!!

Gaara- wow, Everyone's going there tonight!

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

needless to say gaara was fired

http://chaotixfreak. 


	21. happy birthday gaara

SandSibs are morons   
you didn't get me anything...

warning really long undertitle ahead!

...it's in the car! runs off  
you don't have a car  
yes i do  
no you don't  
runs off  
you ran off a while ago  
so?  
you shouldn't still be here  
oh, so now i'm not important  
ashley?  
what!?  
stop talking to yourself...

Ashley- HAPPY BIRTHDAY GAARA!! and for your present i offer you all my love and attention for the day! to surround you with ponys, kitten cats, puppy dogs, and plenty of hugs to drown you in happiness and fun, fun, fun! and i also brought you club soda, cause club soda's pretty fun right? fun! fun! fun! holds hands out to offer him a hug

Gaara- ...

Ashley- .

Gaara- you didn't get me anything did you?

Ashley- ...no TT

http://chaotixfreak. 


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